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Uncle Walter




Come on!



Your Uncle Walter's going on and on


'Bout everything he's seen and done


The voice of 50 years experience


is Drunk, watching the television



You know he's been around the world


Last night he flew to Baghdad


In his magical armchair


With cigarettes and a six pack, yeh, he just got back


The spit's flying everywhere.



Hey, hey, hey, hey (Your Uncle Walter's going on and on)


Why are you back so late? (Where did you go that you were gone so long)


how could you leave me here so long


With Uncle Walter



Your Uncle Walter saw who fired the shots


He drove his chair in the cavalcade


He's flown from South Africa


To countries where


They beat themselves on the backs with chains


There was a fleet of battleships


And one reclining chair


Headed north on the Arabian sea


Now he's back to tell us what


He and his oldest boy Blair


They're getting rich with their mail order scheme



Oh, oh, oh, oh


We're glad you're home


How could you leave me here so long


With Uncle Walter



Your Uncle Walter told me


Everything he'd do if he was president


Oh what a perfect world


This world would be


If he were President now - but he's not!



And he sees the children


Smoking pot


He knows that in a moment


They'll be shooting up heroin


Teardrops in his armchair


A 50 minute lecture


Tobacco juice rolling down his chin



Hey, hey, hey, hey


You're back so late


How could you leave me here so long


With Uncle Walter





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