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The Lyrics Are Below

 Ben Folds

Rent a Cop

 

I’m ‘trolling food court for girls

Yeah, it’s the best job in the world

They know they’re safe with me

They love my little mustache

They love a man in uniform

Oh

 

With my sunglass they can’t

See what I’m really looking at

And as they’re walking by

I whisper through my doughnut

Hey baby, baby light that ass on fire

 

How long must this day go on?

I got to stand here two more hours till I

Punch the clock

How long must this day go on?

 

No kid, they don’t give me a gun

I don’t get paid enough to run

So you can call me what you want

I’ll be hanging at the check out

Checking out your girlfriend

Figure out how she’s going to fit all of that

Butt into that underwear - yeah

Yeah

 

Hey girl if you can’t recall

Where you parked your daddy’s car

Then I could help you out

All alone in this

great big mall

Oh

 

How long must this day go on?

I got to stand here two more hours

Till it’s Miller Time

How long must this day go on?

Whoa oh oh, oh oh

 

I’m ‘trolling food court for girls

 

I whisper through my doughnut

I whisper through my doughnut

I whisper through my doughnut

Hey baby baby, hey baby baby baby

Light that

Light that ass on fire

 

Alright, that’s good

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