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The Lyrics Are Below

 Ben Folds

Army (Live)


Recorded live at:

Roseland Ballroom

New York City, New York



well, I thought about the army

Dad said, "Son, you're fucking high"

and I thought, "yeah, there's a first for everything"

so I took my old man's advice

three sad semesters

it was only 15 grand

spent in bed

I thought about the army

I dropped out and joined a band instead


grew a moustache and a mullet

got a job at Chick-fil-A

citing artistic differences

the band broke up in May

and in June reformed without me

and they got a different name

I nuked another grandma's apple pie

and hung my head in shame

oh no


I've been thinking a lot today

I've been thinking a lot today


woah, I think I'll write a screenplay

woah, I think I'll take it to L.A.

woah, I think I'll get it done yesterday



here we go



1 2 3


keep it up


in this time of introspection

on the eve of my election

I say to my reflection

(audience) God, please spare me more rejection!

cause my peers they criticize me

and my ex-wives all despise me

trying to put it all behind me

but my redneck past is nipping at my heels


I've been thinking a lot today

I've been thinking a lot today

I've been thinking a lot today

I thought about

your mommy


great singing! yeah


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